Sponge bath it is.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
