So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
