i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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