Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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