We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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