just come out here and I will go home with you...
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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