How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
well I can't set my house on fire every night
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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