if only i could text you this smell
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
That accounts for only three of the penises
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
