Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
