Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize
