if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
i think i just lost a toe
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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