I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
