You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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