Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
i was born a porn star she said
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Randomize
