No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
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