Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
