imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
