I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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