watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
