He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
