If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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