Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
