So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize