Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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