I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
