Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Duck Duck Cougar?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
