ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
