How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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