Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
