She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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