8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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