her vagine was all disorganized.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
