so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
