good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
