anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I love having hate sex.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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