Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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