Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
