I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
