Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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