how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
