She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize