Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Randomize