im holly from the hills drunk
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
