I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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