I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
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