eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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