Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Randomize
