Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
it's like iHOP with fire
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
