Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
