This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
